So you’re waking up, and you’ll see some relationships fall away. The inward journey then begins, where you might replay situations over in your head in an attempt to find out what went wrong. Was it you? Was it them? Will you ever get over it?
Simply being awake doesn’t necessarily mean that the end of relationships is any easier. In fact, when you allow yourself to actually FEEL, you could experience pain that you would have previously pushed aside or stuffed down in order to move on with your life.
That’s great! Feel it! It sucks, I know. I’ve had my heart broken into minuscule pieces and stomped on, as I’m certain you’ve had too.
And I’m sure that you know by now that stuffing those feelings down, whether it be emotionally, physically or spiritually, doesn’t serve you. Not only do you fail to glean the lesson from the relationship, you’ll also dredge up those unaddressed issues in future relationships unless you clear them out.
There are plenty of ways to do this, including counseling, crying uncontrollably on the floor for a while, or writing in a journal. Feel that stuff, and let it go.
So how do you know when you are fully over someone, and ready to move on to another relationship?
I made a handy chart for you.
Note that at the beginning of a breakup, you may experience base feelings such as hate, anger, jealousy and other immediate reactions. Such feelings are associated with the lower two chakras: the base chakra and the sacral chakra. These are common initial responses to a breakup.
As you heal—and not generally in a linear fashion, as denoted by the jagged line—your focus will move upward to the higher chakras; feelings related to those energy centers will be more balanced, and head towards greater respect and compassion for your ex. These include acceptance (solar plexus), forgiveness (heart) and wishing your ex well on his or her journey (throat chakra).
Still further along in your healing, you’ll finally move to gratitude and thankfulness for their contribution to your lesson.
This shows that you’ve created a balance among the upper energy centers of the third eye (seeing the reason for the relationship) and the crown chakra (thanking your ex for his or her contribution to your growth.)
How long does this take? Unfortunately, there is no set formula. Variables such as the length of your relationship, the magnitude of the soul lesson, and whether others (such as children) are affected, will all determine your particular healing path.
What’s important is your recognition of your progress! Are you able to look back at the person you WERE, and compare it with the person you are NOW? Such comparisons are the only ones worth making, so please recognize and honor yourself for your growth.
This will prepare you for the next relationship as a better, more loving partner.
Love to you!